Monday, March 29, 2010

Judgement Frustrations

    I'll be the first to admit it; I'm a young mother. I'm also young to be married. But when something is right, it's right and there's no point in waiting. I even was the one to ask HIM to marry ME! But, all that said, I can not Stand when someone who has never met me or even said two words to me feels that they are allowed to make judgements about me and my life.

    Some background: I look younger than I am.. before I was pregnant I was still being asked what highschool I go to. In fact, I am 22 and have already graduated college with a (useless) bachelors degree in Psychology as well as Gender and Women's Studies. I'm sure that I'll appreciate my youthful appearance some time down the line, but right now it is just annoying.  For years I was one of those people who swore that I would never get married and Never Ever have children (at least not of my own body, I'm still terrified of childbirth). Well, finding the right person to share my life with changed that first part, and somehow even changed the second!

    So flash forward to today: I'm walking through a grocery store, buying some fresh fruit while J (the hubby) looked at some protein drinks for me, and in that half a minute that we were seperated one man about 40 years old gives me a look of complete Disgust. Not a little ew look, but like he just puked a little in his mouth because there was this young pregnant woman who was unattended in a grocery store. And this wasn't the first time. I've even heard comments and been told that someone was 'so sorry'. Sorry? You don't know anything about me or my situation, and even if I Was this teenage mother that you've assumed I am, it's Still incredibly rude to make your own judgements about someone else's choices.

    Yesterday, while J was at work I ran into a similar situation. I was thrifting at a Salvation Army for costuming accessories and had stopped to grab some baby clothes for when the baby is finally here. Through the entirety of my time there I was getting those aweful 'pitty looks' from people. I'm sorry, you're shopping at the Salvation Army the same as me.. One person even went so far as to comment to whoever they were shopping with that it was "so sad". Yes, because getting a ton of clothes for the price of one new outfit was 'sad', choosing to save my money for a nicer crib and to be able to take my baby places when she's born is 'sad', and choosing to support a nonprofit organization (even though they are religiously slanted, there aren't any other good thrift stores in the area) instead of buying new clothes made in third-world sweatshops is 'sad'. -sarcasm-

    It makes me want to SCREAM and these are only a couple of recent similar occurrences.

    I think I'm going to stay home for the rest of my pregnancy, or at least only leave the house with the hubby close by my side.. but that would be giving in and I am determined to NEVER be a week woman who lets others decide what is ok and what isn't. So out I go, with my dreads and my head held high. And really, screw those people who think that they have any right to judge me, my life, or my family!

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